


World’s Worst Road Trip

by groomp



Category: The Grand Tour (TV) RPF, Top Gear (UK) RPF
Genre: Coda, Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 03:42:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28557072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/groomp/pseuds/groomp
Summary: Richard knew all this would be cut, but he still considered haggling the editors for a snapshot or two of it.
Relationships: Jeremy Clarkson & Richard Hammond & James May
Comments: 6
Kudos: 11





	World’s Worst Road Trip

**Author's Note:**

> Some little codas on GT 3x13 at around 30 minutes in when they were driving for hours and hours in the dark messing about

Fixing that blown fuse hadn’t taken unbearably long, but it had cost the team quite some precious time. Especially when they were trying to cover around 100 miles a day.

Once they were back in the car -John, now-, the evidence of their lost time was showing, as the sky had grown considerably darker, and the temperature had all but plummeted.

Jeremy shuddered in his seat involuntarily, earning a brief side glance from James before he was smashed right on his shoulder, James also forced to do the same to Richard. This may well have been the most bumpy ride of their lives, and it was quickly getting annoying. But the near constant movement was nothing compared to the biting cold air hitting their face and freezing their limbs.

“Right, stop, stop James, stop. I can’t do this anymore. I need something.” Jeremy finally exclaimed, basically for all three of them at that point, as James brought John to a halt and Jeremy climbed right out, muttering.

“What?” Richard turned around and shouted at Jeremy’s direction.

“Blankets. Something to wrap up in.” James was now shivering, covering his hands under his armpits. Richard nodded and warmed his palms together.

“How long, then?”

James looked at his watch, then the increasingly darkening sky.

“I’d say about 2 or 3 more hours.” When Richard only nodded as a reply, clearly bothered by the cold air blowing at his face without the distraction of a moving scenery, James suddenly found a hint of exasperation within himself, enough to turn and look at where Jeremy had gone.

“Clarkson, what’s the hold up?” His voice left his throat a bit louder than he anticipated, but then again they were freezing to death in their seat, so who could blame him?

“Coming!” The booming voice was inching closer and, after a few seconds, Jeremy had soon appeared right outside the car door, having produced 3 sleeping bags that he then hastily shoved towards James, who handed one to Richard and kept the other two until Jeremy was back in his seat.

Richard had no problem at all getting right inside the sleeping bag without leaving his seat, while James had to dangle his legs outside the car and Jeremy had to physically step out. The mood was somewhat uncomfortable, possibly since all three men were exhausted, hungry and painfully sober.

Soon they were off, the sky growing darker by the minute now. Despite John having proved itself on the journey thus far, getting knocked around was starting to get impossibly bothering.

Jeremy sighed contentedly as his lower half was beginning to show signs of warming up, however his arms and torso were still freezing. Being hit by the rushing chilly air was not helping matters, either. Looking over at Richard, he zipped the sleeping bag right up to his head, leaving only his face exposed. Richard’s eyebrows rose up, he smirked at him and copied his previous movements.

James was now looking at them both back and forth.

“Hold the wheel for a bit,” he warned Jeremy, who stared at him incredulously.

“What do you think you’re doing?” He flapped his hands inside the sleeping bag, fumbling to get them out.

“I’m freezing! I’m zipping up.”

Jeremy shook his head, pausing.

“How do you reckon you’ll be able to drive with your hands tucked inside there?” He asked, giving up on getting his hands out.

James stared ahead for a single beat.

“Well, it’s not like I haven’t done it before! If I remember correctly, the circumstances were pretty much the opposite, right?”

Richard, who had been looking at them like a deranged caterpillar observing gossip on a leaf, chuckled suddenly. Jeremy was then reminded of a struggling James in a sleeping bag, with the heater cranked up to full and unable to turn it off, thanks to his very thoughtful colleague’s sabotaging. Jeremy found himself smiling despite the unpleasant circumstances, a warm feeling radiating in his chest.

James then promptly let go of the steering wheel to zip up his sleeping bag at what he thought was a very fast maneuver, instead of a clumsy move that made the car go out of control immediately and caused both men beside him to start shouting until he regained control of the car, not having managed to zip anything.

“You blithering buffoon!” Jeremy was shouting profanity while James chuckled.

“This is why you should have let me drive John.”

“Your turn was yesterday, Hammond.” Jeremy teased.

“No, it wasn’t!”

“Yes, it was!” James almost immediately joined in.

“Mate, your memory’s really gone to shite.”

A tense beat passed, and then all three men immediately started laughing, Richard burying his exposed face in the fabric.

“We’re cutting that out,” he pointed at the camera on the dashboard, making Jeremy chuckle and comfortable silence fell once more.

—-

The journey had been absent of noise for a little while, apart from John’s engine and the constant bumping and rattling. Darkness had almost fully set in by then, and the cold was really starting to take off. 

James was still behind the wheel, the sleeping bag now covering the back of his head like a hood, but still left his hands, torso and neck almost entirely exposed. Every so often he’d yawn, but didn’t yet seem ready to give up the driver’s seat.

Jeremy was lightly snoozing, or as much as he could manage with all the moving around. Given that John lacked car windows, Jeremy had found solace in using James’ shoulder as a handy pillow to get some kip on. James stole a few glances every now and then, mostly to make sure Jeremy wasn’t drooling on said shoulder.

“Is he asleep?” Richard asked, and James almost didn’t hear him over all the racket and engine grunts.

“Yeah,” came James’ delayed response. Richard stretched in his sleeping bag.

“That shoulder does look comfy,” James turned to glance at him deadpan.

“I need that arm for the gear change.”

Richard promptly slumped over and his head hit the shoulder, a bit harder than he intended.

“I know.” He looked at James right in the eyes, a devilish grin written all over his face. Expecting James to shove him off, he was surprised instead that James gave him a warm smile and continued looking down the road. 

Richard knew all this would be cut, but he still considered haggling the editors for a snapshot or two of it.

**Author's Note:**

> basically I want the entire unedited footage Amazon, actually no I want the entire days long unedited footage of every single special ever made on TG and TGT :’(


End file.
